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  <Freedom is Not Free>는 욕망과 희망, 자유를 주제로 젊은 새터민들과 협업하여 진행한 프로젝트 작업 시리즈입니다.
1984년에 한국에서 태어나 자라난 작가에게 분단국이라는 정치적 이슈는 자연스러우면서도 떼어놓지 못하는 첨예한 지점에 있습니다. 분단 이후 태어난 많은 젊은 세대들에게 자유 민주주의는 익숙한 환경이지만, 반만년의 역사를 함께한이북은 정치적으로 자유가 억압되고 폐쇄 된 공간입니다.
현재 자유를 찾아 남한에 자리 잡은 새터민들의 수는 3만을 넘었습니다. 목숨을 걸고 탈북을 시도한 이들에게 ‘남한’이라는 공간은 희망과 욕망, 판타지적 상상이 결합된 공간입니다. 이들이 목숨을 걸고 탈북을 하며 갖고 싶어 했던 가치는 어쩌면 우리에게는 익숙한 일상의 일부일도 모릅니다. 정치적인 자유가 억압된 곳에서 자유를 찾아 온 이들이 욕망했던 가치를 5가지 키워드로 바라보면서, 이 일상적이면서도 전부가 되는 가치를 통해 우리 곁에 공기처럼 존재하는 ‘자유’의 무게를 재고해보고자 합니다.
북한에서영양실조에시달려쥐를먹었을만큼너무나힘겨운유년기를보낸김아라님은북한의생활이너무힘들어10대에탈북했고, 현재는한국에서연기자의꿈을이루고있습니다. 아름다운그녀를모델로티아라를쓴화려한여성의이미지를제작하였습니다. 특히꾸미고싶은데꾸밀것이없어사탕껍질로리본을만들어달고다녔다는그녀의스토리를티아라에담아, 사탕껍질리본으로장식된티아라를그렸습니다. 작품배경에그녀는어려웠던시절을회고하는일기를써내려갔습니다.
남한의땅을처음밟았을때, 김아라님은이곳이조선말을쓰는미래세계같았다고합니다. 김아라님이안경에쓴문구는‘Future is here'입니다.
About Kim Ah-ra
북한에서영양실조에시달려쥐를먹었을만큼너무나힘겨운유년기를보낸김아라님은북한의생활이너무힘들어10대에탈북했고, 현재는한국에서연기자의꿈을이루고있습니다. 아름다운그녀를모델로티아라를쓴화려한여성의이미지를제작하였습니다. 특히꾸미고싶은데꾸밀것이없어사탕껍질로리본을만들어달고다녔다는그녀의스토리를티아라에담아, 사탕껍질리본으로장식된티아라를그렸습니다. 작품배경에그녀는어려웠던시절을회고하는일기를써내려갔습니다.
남한의땅을처음밟았을때, 김아라님은이곳이조선말을쓰는미래세계같았다고합니다. 김아라님이안경에쓴문구는‘Future is here'입니다.
아버지가자주드나드시던밭에서짚풀로작은움막을만들어살았다. 혹시오시지않을까, 울면서아빠를기다렸다. 당시나는열살이었다. 꾸미는것을좋아했지만꾸밀것이없어잿더미에서사탕봉지를주워리본을만들어보기도했다.
검정고시를보고대학을가고우연한기회에방송을하며나는나의트라우마를정면으로마주할수있었다. 가면을쓰듯나를숨기고조용히살아야한다고생각했는데, 내가나의지난시간을말하며그시절의아픔을치유할수있었다. 웹드라마로연기를시작한이후연기가주는카타르시스를느꼈다.
지금은연기자의꿈을꾸며달려가고있다. 꿈이뭔지, 그의미를몰랐지만이제는안다.
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검정고시를보고대학을가고우연한기회에방송을하며나는나의트라우마를정면으로마주할수있었다. 가면을쓰듯나를숨기고조용히살아야한다고생각했는데, 내가나의지난시간을말하며그시절의아픔을치유할수있었다. 웹드라마로연기를시작한이후연기가주는카타르시스를느꼈다.
지금은연기자의꿈을꾸며달려가고있다. 꿈이뭔지, 그의미를몰랐지만이제는안다.
검정고시를보고대학을가고우연한기회에방송을하며나는나의트라우마를정면으로마주할수있었다. 가면을쓰듯나를숨기고조용히살아야한다고생각했는데, 내가나의지난시간을말하며그시절의아픔을치유할수있었다. 웹드라마로연기를시작한이후연기가주는카타르시스를느꼈다.
지금은연기자의꿈을꾸며달려가고있다. 꿈이뭔지, 그의미를몰랐지만이제는안다.
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<Freedom is Not Free> is a series of project work in collaboration with young North Korean defectors on the subject of desire, hope, and freedom.
The political issue of a divided country is at a point where it is natural and cannot be separated from the artist who was born in Korea in 1984 and raised in the same country. For many young people born after the division, liberal democracy might be a familiar environment, but the North, where we have shared a history of more than half a century, is a space where political freedom is suppressed and closed.
There are now more than 30 thousand North Korean defectors who have found freedom in South Korea. For those who have tried to escape with their lives at risk, ‘South Korea’ is a space that combines hope, desire, and fantastical imagination. The value they wanted to attain even if it meant risking their lives is just a part of our everyday lives. As I look at the desired values of those who sought freedom from a place where political freedom is suppressed in 5 kinds of keywords,I try to reconsider the weight of ‘freedom’ that exists like air for us—ordinary but all-inclusive. Kim Ah-ra, who spent such a difficult childhood
suffering from malnutrition to the point of eating a rat, was so tired of her
life in North Korea that she escaped when she was a teenager, and is now
dreaming of becoming an actress in South Korea. I created a work with her as
the model, with the image of a gorgeous woman wearing a tiara. In particular, I
wanted to decorate her but couldn’t find anything so I drew a ribbon made out
of candy wrappers, inspired by her story where she used candy wrappers to make
a ribbon to wear them. In the work, she is writing on her diary, recalling the
difficult times she went through.
Kim Ah-ra says that when she first stepped into
the land of South Korea, she felt like it was a futuristic world that used the
language of Chosun. The phrase Kim Ah-ra wrote in the glasses of the work is
‘Future is here.’
ABOUT Kim Ah-ra
I lived in severe poverty. Since we didn’t have
anything to eat, my mother went to China to get something to eat, and my father
fed me rats when I fainted due to malnutrition. My father remarried a woman
with a child. I was happy to just be able to call someone ‘mom’, a title that I
wasn’t able to use for such a long time. But I had to spend a torturous time
due to the abuse from my stepmother and stepsister. Ultimately, my father found
out, got a divorce, and remarried again, but we were still poor and our
environment was tough. At my father’s disappearance, my stepmother kicked me
out.
I made a small hut using straw grass in the
field where my father used to go. I waited for my father, crying and thinking
he might show up. At that time, I was ten years old. I liked dressing up but I
didn’t have anything to decorate with, so I took candy wrappers from the ash
and made a ribbon.
There was a rather well-off house in the village
with a TV. When the people in the neighborhood went to watch the TV in that
house, I thought of this as an ‘opportunity’ and followed them. Picking up and
wiping all visible things, I tried my best to show that I am a ‘useful’ person.
It seemed like my efforts showed as I was able to live as a housekeeper, but
whenever things would go wrong, they would shout, “This is because you’re unlucky!”
I tried to kill myself multiple times using rat poison. Giving up everything in
desperation, I looked for the broker who took my mother, and met my mother in
China. Deceived by the broker, my mother was married to a Chinese man and I
stayed with them before coming to Korea.
I found out about South Korea in China. In the
TV, I saw the landscape of the foreign country that used the Chosun language
spread across the screen. An outer space that used the Chosun language—that was
what Korea was.
I have had severe pangs of hunger before, but I
became depressed the few years I spent in Korea. Everyone is educated here and
this is a better environment than North Korea. I would ask myself who I am every
time I would feel the distance between them and me. To be able to go to school,
and to be educated—this is ‘freedom.’
I got into college after taking a school
qualification examination, and by chance, I joined a broadcasting show and was
able to meet face-to-face with my trauma. I thought that I should be hiding
quietly like wearing a mask, but I was able to heal the pain of my past by
speaking about it. Since I started acting in a web drama, I have felt the
catharsis of acting.
Now, I am running towards my dream of becoming
an actress. I didn’t know what dreams were, and what it meant, but now I know.
소장처 : 개인 컬렉터 소장
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